If you are here because the proxy told you to update, go to the "Downloads" page.
Here's another try. This one seems to fix the problem for some people. If you still have problems, it might be worth deleting the contents of your %appdata%/.minecraft directory and seeing if that helps. Make sure to backup your saves directory if you want to keep your worlds though.
This should solve the problems people have been having with the launcher as of 2/4/2016-ish. I haven't set the update as required yet but you can download it. If you get a launcher that's about 300kb that's the wrong one. You want the one that's about 90kb.
This one should finally work with 1.7.9. I still haven't gotten skins working with it, but that's next on the list.
Due to one of the ways that the site was changed, some people may have noticed being unable to get into their old accounts. I've made some changes to the database so everyone should have their old accounts back.
You may have noticed something... different, about the site. Hopefully the new layout is a little less horrible than the old one. My friend is going to help me improve it further in the coming days/weeks/someday since I can't design worth a damn.